Friday, February 01, 2008

Purgatory Here I Come

It is only fitting to end Blasphemy Week here at MMM by reporting my results from the Dante's Inferno Internet Test:

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory!

You have escaped damnation and made it to Purgatory, a place where the dew of repentance washes off the stain of sin and girds the spirit with humility. Through contrition, confession, and satisfaction by works of righteousness, you must make your way up the mountain. As the sins are cleansed from your soul, you will be illuminated by the Sun of Divine Grace, and you will join other souls, smiling and happy, upon the summit of this mountain. Before long you will know the joys of Paradise as you ascend to the ethereal realm of Heaven.

Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
[Note: sorry about the formatting - blogger doesn't seem to like tables]

Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Very High
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)Very High
Level 2 (Lustful)High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Very Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)Low
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)Low

So, I'm a virtuous but lustful non-believer who nonetheless squeeks into purgatory, but I'm not at all a heretic. I'm beginning to suspect that this test might not be terribly valid. I guess heresy must be different for Dante than for contemporary Christians. He probably views this whole substitutionary atonement through satisfaction thing as just a fad.

Ironically, despite correctly identifying my inner lust, there was an ad at the top of the results page offering to find me an internet girlfriend:

Or maybe it isn't so ironic. Maybe that's how this site makes their money - food for the gluttons, girls for the pervs, guns for the violent, and New Age books for the heretics. Hmmm...I wonder what circle of hell opportunistic capitalists go to...


Rebecca said...

I took the test and got into purgatory with a "high", with moderate scores in the virtuous nonbeliever, lust, and violence (??) categories. (To be honest, I thought I'd score higher as a glutton.) And I got the same ad at the top of my scores, so the type of ad that appears must not be linked to one's besetting sin. (Though that *was* an interesting idea.)

Lazy Gal Tonya said...
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